“When I was diagnosed with AIDS in December of ‘89, I was only 21 years old. It was the shock of my life and my family’s as well. I have lived to see my hair fall out, my body lose over 40 pounds, blisters on my sides. I’ve lived to go through nausea and vomiting, continual night sweats, chronic fevers of 103-104 that don’t go away anymore. I have cramping and diarrhea. I now have confusion and forgetfulness. I have lived through the torturous acne that infested my face and neck - brought on by AZT. I have endured trips twice a week to Miami for 3 months only to receive painful IV injections. I’ve had blood transfusions. I’ve had a bone marrow biopsy. I cried my heart out from the pain of the biopsy.
“I lived through the fear of whether or not my liver has been completely destroyed by DDI and other drugs. It may very well be. I lived to see white fungus grow all over the inside of my mouth, the back of my throat, my gums, and now my lips. It looks like white fur and it gives you atrocious breath. Isn’t that nice? I have tiny blisters on my lips. It may be the first stages of herpes.
“I was infected by Dr. Acer in 1987. My life has been sheer hell except for the good times and closeness with my family and my enjoyment for life and nature. AIDS has slowly destroyed me. Unless a cure is found, I will be another one of your statistics soon.
“Who do I blame? Do I blame myself? I sure don’t. I never used IV drugs, never slept with anyone and never had a blood transfusion. I blame Dr. Acer and every single one of you bastards. Anyone that knew Dr. Acer was infected and had full-blown AIDS and stood by not doing a damn thing about it. You are all just as guilty as he was. You’ve ruined my life and my family’s. I forgive Dr. Acer because I believe the disease affected his mind. He wasn’t able to think properly and he continued to practice.
“Do you know my family will be emotionally scarred by this forever? Do you know my mother lost her mother, father, grandfather and dog in a car accident when she was a teenager - and now she’s going to lose her first born child?
“Have you ever awakened in the middle of the night soaking wet from a night sweat - only to have it happen again an hour later. Can you imagine what it’s like to realize you’re losing weight in your fingers and that your body may be using its muscles to try to survive. Or do you know what it’s like to look at yourself in a full-length mirror before you shower–and you only see a skeleton? Do you know what I did? I slid to the floor and I cried. Now I shower with a blanket over the mirror.
“Well–I think I’ve said enough. Like I said–all is forgiven by me–there’s no hard feelings anymore. But I will never forget.
“P.S. If laws are not formed to provide protection, then my suffering and death was in vain.
“I’m dying guys. Goodbye. "
